Okay. I have my appointment scheduled with my surgeon. I'm waiting again. I have 3 weeks until my appointment. Now what do I do??? I have to do something! I was given 'Your Breast Cancer Treatment Handbook' book by Judy C. Kneece, RN, OCN from the the Breast Center. They highlighted a few areas to read over, like 'Sentinel Lymph Node Mapping and Surgery', 'Lumpectomy Procedures' and lasting 'Radiation Therapy.' Normally I'm ready to read over anything and dig in, but this was different. I didn't want to read about this. Not medical stuff! It made me weak in the knees, but I knew I had to be informed. Denial wasn't gonna help me.
I would come home on my lunch break and the first thing I would do was Google "breast cancer", and the terror began. Oh. My. The stories. They were plain heart wrenching and down right scary. It seemed like every site I ended up on was doom and gloom! After about a week of this self inflicted emotional roller coaster I realized this scare tactic was not going to help me in anyway! I had to get a grip. Constant Googling was going to give me a heart attack before I died of Breast Cancer!!! It was like driving by a car accident, I HAD TO LOOK!
I had to start forcing myself daily to stick to the "official" Breast Cancer sites. You know, stick to the facts. I had to consciously force myself to only look at what I knew I had. I could NOT worry about what I MIGHT have! What good was that going to do for me?
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